This semester break is not gonna be like my others break. This time, i oathed myself to awake from the apathy of my studies. By hook or by crook, I have to at least mastered half of SPM syllabus especially on science subjects.
These are the subjects I have to covered during this break.
By far i think i am lazy, i think that if i put extra effort on my studies, i can pass my exam with flying colours. I prefer to study at the last minute and promised to be well prepared on next exam. Always. But today i just realized something. I am actually not smart. No matter how much i study i dont think i can ace. Im so scared. I have a very big dream to pursue my studies overseas. I am scared. So so scared. I cant imagine if i dont pass my SPM with good results as what my parents want. I am about to despair. I feel like i cant hold these anymore. Surrounded with geniuses made me feel like a total loser. I am helpless. I couldnt stop myself from crying when i started to think about my future.
Tomorrow is biology and account paper. I am now suffering from flu. My head feels so dizzy and heavy. My eyes cant stop from watering. My runny nose make me hard to breath.
Holla. Its been ages. I lost my internet connection due to some personal reason. People assumed that i was busy studying during those moments when i suddenly disappeared from social networks but the real thing is i live my life like a helpless dolphin without wifi.
Now i am in examination week. I dont want to comment so much so just lets proceed to other things.
Today is mother's day. Ya like always people HERE will argue about this issue. We cant celebrate it bla bla bla. As for me , everything actually is upon someone 's nawaitu. But whatever i dont want to comment since i dont have any right to do so.